18 September 2011

Save Your Drama, Mama(s)

"Hatred is a learned behavior. It worked. I hate "them" for attempting to instill it in me."
~Robin Garrett-Welsh~

What's scarier than ONE mother with a heart full of hate? ONE MILLION mothers with hearts full of hate!

JUST in case you haven't heard, Dancing With The Stars has announced their fall lineup and stirring up quite the controversy is Cher's transgender child, Chaz Bono. Since I'm not a huge fan of the show, or television in general, I didn't tune in the night of the big reveal. It wasn't until the following morning when I logged onto my computer and saw a headline reading, "New Dancing Cast Announced: One Very Controversial Figure." Okay, of course I'll bite.


I clicked on the lineup and perused the list once, twice, three times..."who the hell is the controversial figure?!" I thought to myself. The suspense was killing me. "It just has to be Nancy Grace," I concluded. Or maybe, just maybe, David Arquette in light of his recent separation from Courtney Cox and subsequent rehab stay, perhaps?  Then I watched a news clip stating that an organization called, One Million Moms was calling for the boycott of Dancing With The Stars because Chaz Bono would be dancing this year. WHAT?! Seriously?!


I googled the "Mommies Dearest," found their website and the title of the "hate du jour" read, "Dancing with the Stars has Spun Out of Control!" "Now they have gone too far! Not only are they casting Carson Kressley (gasp, a gay man!), but also transgender Chaz Bono. Both are LGBT rights advocates and promote this destructive lifestyle," states the website. Destructive lifestyle? Really? As opposed to your hate spewing "nondestructive" lifestyle? Then they blame DWTS for "helping them create visibility for the LGBT community." OMG! OMG! OMG!


First and foremost, I don't know a whole lot of children who are even remotely interested in watching Dancing With The Stars. Secondly, it's called DANCING WITH THE STARS, not, Delving Into The Personal Lives of Stars! And thirdly, children wouldn't even know that Chaz OR Carson are any different than you or me if you didn't make such a BIG DEAL OUT OF IT!! But that's what you "haters" love to do; pass YOUR ignorance down from generation to generation.


If you are truly intent on boycotting something, why don't you boycott the AT&T commercial where the husband comes home and tells the wife that he purchased a phone plan for the entire family. She immediately begins berating him and mumbling that her "mother was right, she should have married John Clark." It makes my heart hurt every single time I see it come on. Or how about the Jerry Springer show that comes on right when children are coming home from school? Or just about any other ridiculous reality show that is on the television? The "Real" Housewives of ANYWHERE? You've got to be kidding me!! Better yet, why don't you turn the stupid television off and play a board game with your child, read with your child or bake brownies to take to school and share some kindness. By the time DWTS comes on, your child should be getting ready for bed with a good book anyway.

Another idea would be to focus your "Christian" attention (and pent up animosity) on the growing number of teen suicides or the epidemic levels in which bullying has reached. Wouldn't that make your heart feel better and all those hate lines disappear from your face? The poor children that are killing themselves because they are "different," are mostly YOUR children and they are afraid of you and the type of bully offspring that you are producing.


Now, I'd like to tell you how it all went down in my home; my peace loving home. Chaz was scheduled to appear on Oprah to talk about his "new life," and I was anxious to watch as I grew up with Sonny and Cher and their precious little girl, Chastity. My son asked me what Oprah was about and I began telling him about the person that Chaz used to be and about her famous parents. I pulled up pictures on the computer of a young Chastity and told him how I used to think she was the cutest little girl I'd ever seen. He agreed, but we both noticed how sad she looked in most all of the pictures as opposed to how happy she seemed telling her story of becoming the person she should have been.

And since wishing for a couple of penises to fall off in my lifetime does not make me an expert in transgenderism, I simply imparted the basics, in an age appropriate and gentle manner. And instead of focusing on whether Chaz wanted to stand up or sit down to use the bathroom, I elected to focus on the core matter, and that is the end result; the smiles, the laughter and the happily ever afters. My child listened intently with the utmost empathy as I explained  how Chaz will still not be free as the hate mongers will always be there to judge him, ridicule him and as it turns out, even boycott him. I saw the sadness in my child's face at the mere thought that there are actually people who feed on this type of ignorance. I should also point out that my child is a Christian who reads the bible and believes that all people are good....because that is how he has been raised.



So, fast way forward to the Dancing debacle and the "controversy" over Chaz Bono....as my son and I are at dinner I said, "Guess what? Remember Chaz Bono, he is going to be on Dancing With The Stars." "Cool, dancing or as a judge?" "Dancing, however, there is a bit of a problem. There is a group that is threatening to boycott the show because he will be on." "WHAT?! WHY?!" "Because he used to be a she, and even though he doesn't pay these peoples bills, sit down to dinner with any of them or have any impact on these people whatsoever, they still believe that it is their right to tell him who or what he can do with HIS LIFE," I explained. "That seems like a ridiculous waste of energy, doesn't it Mom?" he asked. "Yes, Baby, it does and it breaks my heart that ANYONE has to be subjected to this type of nonsensical brutality," I said.  Then he added that he didn't even know any kids that watched Dancing With The Stars.


This type of prejudice is so foreign to me and something I suppose I will never be able to understand. There are REAL problems out there, like the number of children that are on facebook, being exposed to, often times, raunchy adult conversations, lewd photographs, and drunken banter. Facebook rules state that you must be at least 13 years old to even sign up, however, I see children who are much younger with accounts, indicating that they are falsifying their birth dates in order to get an account.  That means parents are teaching their children that it is okay to lie in order to partake in a "grown-up" environment, despite all the warnings surrounding the stresses and bullying that comes along with the "membership." Now THERE'S a cause for you!


Anyway, I hadn't planned on turning the television back on until the new season of American Idol started, but I think, just for kicks, grins and major well wishes, I'll tune in to DWTS to see Chaz dance tomorrow evening. I hope he receives a standing ovation for being bold enough to persevere and not let the haters get the best of him. BONUS if Momma Bear Cher is there!



Cha, Cha, Cha, Chaz!!
The Paper Whisperer